Win, Lose and Kaboom! Transcript

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The following is a transcript of the episode: Win, Lose and Kaboom!.

Mib.

Mibs.

Mibs! Mib! Mib!

Mib! Mib! Mib! Mibs!

( all saying "Mib" )

( thundering roar )

ALL:

Mib!

I will crush you!

Not if I crush you first!

I defy you to crush me!

You're almost crushed already!

I hear talking,

but I don't see

much crushing!

You want to go

two out of three?

Now, to make the treaty

legally binding,

sign here, here,

and here

and initial here.

Cindy, when I suggested

that we be friends,

I didn't mean

you should draw up contracts.

But this makes it

so much cleaner.

It simply says that

while you may be a genius,

I am better at people skills

and Tae Kwon Do.

Can't we just

try to be nice

to each other?

Yes, once we lock in

the terms.

Now quit stalling

and sign the stupid contract!

Hi, Libby.

You smell beautiful

today.

What do you call

that scent?

Paint fumes.

I've been helping my mom

redo the kitchen.

And speaking

of your eyes,

they're like

two limpid pools

shimmering in

the golden sun.

Sheen, do you have

a temperature?

Yes!

I'm a red-hot tamale

ever since I sent away

for this booklet

in the back of

Dingo Man Comics!

"How to Impress

the Ladies"?

Guaranteed to make me

your boyfriend

or one-eighth

of my money back.

Allow six weeks

for shipping.

But, Sheen, I already .

Let's just let things

happen naturally.

Sorry, babe--

the love train's

left the station.

And now to pick

an adorable nickname

for you.

Sheen...

You want to exit

the love train?

( whistle toots )

All right.

What's the nickname?

I made a list!

How about "Puff Mommy?"

No.

"Sorceress of Sass?"

Nuh-uh.

"Libby-licious?"

Try again.

"Puppy Paws?"

Pass.

"Frankie

'Three Chins'

DeCarlo?"

Say what?

Just throwing it

out there.

( sniffing )

Good forward nose...

Yeah, yeah,

uh-huh.

Nice coloration...

Yeah, hurry up.

Excellent density...

Would you come on!?

I said sample my new

low-budget ice creams,

not bore them to death!

Hello!

That's what I'm trying to do!

( clears throat )

So? How do you like

the Catfish Swirl?

Hmm, not bad.

But not as good as your

Mocha Almond Tile Grout!

Mmm... grouty.

( Goddard whimpering )

Neutron,

what's the hold-up?

And why is your hand

trembling like that?

( siren begins wailing )

The town's

emergency siren!

Sheen, Carl, follow me.

I may need you!

Wait!

What about the treaty?

Oh!

I'll be back,

"Princess Funkenstein!"

No!

( jet engine roaring )

What's going on,

Jimmy?

I don't know,

but it sure is big.

Jimbo, get inside, son!

It's an emergency!

I can't, Dad.

I'm flying up to see

what's going on.

I'd better

come along.

It could be dangerous.

Sorry, no can do.

The extra weight will

slow the rocket.

Yeah, but...

Well...

Uh, if you need me

don't hesitate to...

Call.

Ha! You call that

a plane?

Sheen, don't tease

the military.

Goddard, call up

omni-directional

scanner.

Now zoom in.

It can't be.

I'm going in closer, guys!

What is it, Jimmy?

An alien

message rock?

I thought they were

just a myth.

Well, get a good look,

because that guy's

about to waste it.

No! What's he doing?

He doesn't know what it is!

Captain, this is Jimmy!

Don't sh**t that rock!

Out of the way, fly-boy!

No, you don't understand!

It contains an important message

for Earth!

Yeah? Well, here's my message:

Eat lead, space rock!

( beeping )

Engaging cloaking device!

Hey... where'd

the space rock go?

Oh, well.

Men, back to the base

for milk and cookies!

Yee-haw!

PILOT:

Yes, sir, milk

and cookies!

Non-geniuses can really

make life difficult.

And how.

Tell me about it.

Now, I'll simply trap it

in a suspension beam

and lower it gently

to the ground.

( barking )

It's headed right for

our street!

Hold on, guys!

( all screaming )

My entire life's passing

before my eyes again!

( laughs )

Remember when

we shaved our heads?

Yeah, that was cool.

( both screaming )

Engaging suspension beam!

( inhaling deeply )

Oh, what a day!

Morning, Wheezer!

Morning, squirrels!

Morning, two-ton space rock

hurtling down on my head...

( screaming )

Honey...

call the chiropractor.

( cracking )

( audience murmuring )

Order! Order, I say!

My friends, what in the name

of Tarzan's tree house

are we going to do

about this space rock?

Space rock evil!

Must destroy!

Let me make ice cream

out of it, yeah.

I can make that rock

a superstar!

( all talking at once )

People!

People, please!

I know what this rock is!

Carl, Sheen,

show the first slide.

Lights!

Ow!

Sheen, I'm right

next to you!

Since 1511,

there have been reports

of rocks with strange symbols

falling from the daytime sky.

In every case,

these rocks were destroyed

before scientists had a chance

to study them.

These are those rocks.

Minsk, Russia, 1653.

Rock pulverized

by imperial guards.

Reykjavík, Iceland, 1810.

Also crushed.

Lima, Peru, 1880:

rock elected mayor,

then overthrown by rebels.

At least it wasn't crushed.

JIMMY:

Then crushed.

Butte, Montana, 1957:

rock made into soup

and eaten by prospectors.

( Sheen screams )

SHEEN:

Carl!

Ladies and gentlemen,

the aliens that sent

these message stones

are today giving Earth

another chance.

I implore you to let me take

the rock to my lab for study!

( all conversing )

Well, Jimmy, in light

of this new information,

I've rendered a decision...

Wait!

I'd like to comment

about my friend Jimmy's

excellent plan!

Cindy, no,

I don't need your help.

I thought

you agreed

I have valuable

contributions to make.

Yeah, but...

Thanks, you

won't be sorry.

Fellow townspeople,

my friend Jimmy is a genius,

and his plan makes

a lot of sense...

but I'm not convinced.

Hey, you said

we were friends!

And friends

should tell you

when you're wrong.

People, just because

we receive a message

from aliens

doesn't mean

we have to answer it.

But think what they have

to teach us!

If they're friendly!

Haven't we learned

from the Yolkians

not to talk to

intergalactic strangers?

( all vehemently agreeing )

Well, what in the name

of Gandhi's tap shoes

are we going to do with it?

Well, I was thinking

we could turn it into

a tourist attraction

and use the money to buy

new schoolbooks.

( all agreeing

enthusiastically )

Now we're getting somewhere!

All in favor of makingk

a tacky, overpriced tourist

attraction, say "aye."

ALL:

Aye!

No!

It's unanimous!

The motion's passed.

Now where's my big, shiny car?

( tires screeching )

Gosh, Neutron,

this friendship thing

is working out well.

Mystery space rock!

Step right up

and take your picture

with the mystery

space rock!

Carl, what are you

doing?

Well, after Cindy

made the rock

into a tourist

attraction...

( snorts )

the town made me

photographer.

Take my picture, my good man.

I'd be delighted.

( screams )

I'm blinded!

( sighs )

This is ridiculous!

A communication from

a highly advanced society

falls right

into our laps

and I can't even

examine it.

But everyone voted,

Jimmy.

It was a shining example

of democracy.

To heck

with democracy!

Stand back, Carl.

What are you going to do?

If the rock won't come

to the lab,

then the lab will come

to the rock.

No! This is terrible!

What is it,

Hugh?

My favorite show, General

Post Office, is canceled!

Oh, that's all.

"That's all"?

Sugarbooger,

that show had

everything!

The episode where Marlene

got stuck in the sorter

made me laugh, and cry,

and hack up phlegm

all at the same time!

Well, look at the bright side.

Now you can spend that much

more time with Jimmy.

Jimbo? Our son?

Oh, that's a great

idea, shug-boog!

I bet he's craving

my advice

on one of his science

project thingies

right now.

Okay, lady, smile.

( screams )

I did it again!

There you are,

Jimbo.

How's it going, sport?

Oh, hi, Dad.

Just decoding these

hieroglyphics.

Hmm, I bet it's some

sort of recipe,

maybe for space gazpacho.

That'd be spicy, huh?

Actually, whoever sent this

seems to be posing

some sort of riddle

to us.

Ooh, a riddle,

no kidding.

I love riddles.

Hey, I have a doozy!

It seems there were

these three Irish fellows,

Colin, Liam

and Seamus...

Um, Dad, if you

don't mind,

I think I'd like

to do this on my own.

It's pretty complicated.

( sadly ):

Oh.

Of course, Jimmy.

What was I thinking?

My son, the genius.

Didn't mean

to... interrupt.

I knew you'd understand.

See you at dinner.

Jimmy!

Don't worry!

They tried

to get me to tell,

but I didn't say

a word!

Sheen, calm down.

What is it?

The army's looking for you!

They know you took

the space rock.

Huh?

They asked me

where you were,

but I'm no stoolie!

I said, "Jimmy's

my friend.

"If he's with the rock

in the park,

you're not going

to hear it from me!"

Sheen, remind me to remove

what's left of your brain later.

MAN ( on loudspeaker ):

Jimmy Neutron,

this is General Abercrombie.

Step away from the rock!

But, General,

it's a message

to us from space.

I'm on the verge

of translating it!

I don't care if you're going

to take it slow-dancing!

It's strange and unfamiliar,

so we have to destroy it!

No offense, but you don't know

what you're talking about!

All right, mister,

I warned you!

Hey, what are

you doing?

Get off that!

Goddard, take me up!

( barking )

Faster, Goddard!

They're getting away!

Prepare to launch

locating device!

Good...

Now steady...

Jimmy, aren't

you done

with

my pictures

yet?

Not yet, Carl.

They're my only record

of the rock's hieroglyphics.

Hey, look-- I have people

on my belly.

I'm very close,

guys.

The aliens' language system

seems to mix

advanced prime numbers

with a variant of early Aramaic.

Once I send the symbols through

this program I rigged...

Guys, look!

What does it mean?

I don't know.

CARL:

"In the dark, they arrive

without being fetched.

In the light, they are lost

without being stolen."

Carl, call Cindy and Libby

and tell them to meet us

at the army base at 2100!

2100? But that's

decades from now!

It means 9:00.

Oh. That's better for me.

Neutron,

if the army

took the rock,

they must have

a reason.

Yeah, Jimmy,

we could get

in trouble.

Go ahead and leave,

or stay and be tiny footnotes

to science history!

Tiny footnotes!

Yeah, footnotes!

Works for me.

Whatever.

Now, I was able to attach

a locating device to the rock

before the army took it away.

Ready, guys?

Ready!

Let's find that rock.

( spraying )

( music similar to

Mission: Impossible plays )

( Goddard whirring )

( Mission: Impossible music

still playing )

( music ends )

Hello, fellow children!

ALL:

Bolbi?!

Bolbi, what are you do?

Bolbi worship giant sp!

Bolbi spiritual.

But how did you...?

Never mind.

My friends,

by answering the riddle

inscribed on this rock,

I will be sealing

Earth's friendship

with an advanced alien.

"In the dark, they arrive

without being fetched.

In the light, they are lost

without being stolen."

The answer?

Creamed corn? Republicans?

No.

The stars.

( electronic voice ):

Intruder alert! Intruder alert!

Funny riddle, Jimmy.

Can we go now?!

What? No!

This is my only chance

to fill in the answer!

Then step on it!

You're the only one who

knows the way out of here!

Hey, you kids!

Stop right there!

Jimmy...!

JIMMY:

Almost done.

Almost dead.

Finished!

( all yelling )

CARL:

Wh-what's happening?!

CINDY:

I-I'll tell you

what's happening!

We're being sucked into space!

CARL:

Jimmy, I'm scared!

JIMMY:

Don't be scared, Carl!

A civilization this advanced

has no need for v*olence!

Where are we?

I don't know.

Prepare yourself,

guys.

I'm afraid the ways

of this culture

may be too sophisticated for

our meager minds to comprehend.

( power switches on )

REVERBERATING VOICE:

Humans of the planet Earth,

you have been judged

by the Great Stone

to be an advanced species...

ANNOUNCER'S VOICE:

So come on down

for fabulous prizes!

( perky game show tune playing )

It's time for the Malvexian

Galaxy's favorite game show,

Intergalactic Showdown!

( perky game show tune playing )

ANNOUNCER:

Now, here's the host

of Intergalactic Showdown,

the omnipowerful Melda!

( applause )

( gasping )

Thank you, thank you.

What a fantastic crowd.

A contestant search?!

Your "important message

from space"

is a lousy

contestant search?

Sweet!

Will there be prizes?

And big cash

jackpots?

I'd love a fabulous

dream vacation!

This can't be!

The rock indicated a cultured,

highly advanced society!

Whoop,

whoop, whoop!

Boo-yah!

This week's show

pits these tiny-brained hominids

from the outer rim

against some of the galaxy's

most interesting life-forms.

Let's meet those life-forms now!

Vandana?

Thanks, Meldar!

They're smart, they're sassy,

and they've evolved

to a nonskeletal form.

Meet the Brains!

CHILDREN:

Eww...

Next, they've been called the

sharpest species in the galaxy.

Say hello to the Needleheads!

Mib!

( all repeating "mib" )

Oh, man, those voices

are going to get on my nerves.

And finally, they're

a warmongering species

from the Kondracke Belt,

give it up for the Gorlocks!

( A few aliens in the audience are booing )

My in-laws will feast on your entrails!

Thanks, Vandana!

It looks like it will be

quite a match!

Now, let's get right to...

Excuse me.

Just what kind

of game is this?

( laughing )

Now, don't make fun.

Remember, it did

take them 500 years

to solve

the Riddle-Stone.

I'll explain it

to you slowly.

You'll be competing

against those species

in various "challenges."

The winner gets

a fabulous new car!

The loser gets their

home planet destroyed!

( gasping )

I can't believe

this is happening!

I know.

We could win

a new car!

Count us out, Meldar.

We refuse to participate

in this crude spectacle.

But, Jimmy,

the car!

Then you forfeit.

Your planet will be

destroyed in five, four,

three, two...

ALL:

No!

Stop!

We'll play! We'll play!

Wonderful.

The battle for survival

will begin in a moment.

But first, a word

from the good folks

at Quiznox Tentacle Lubricant!

Hugh, no one

seems to know

where the children are.

Oh, you know kids.

They're probably out

playing some crazy

space-alien game.

( laughs )

Look at duckie!

REVERBERATING VOICE:

Humans of Earth.

Your planet is being connected

to the Galactic Cable Network,

with over nine billion channels

of service.

Free cable?!

From space?!

MELDAR:

Enjoy watching your fellow

creatures play for their lives

on this edition of

Intergalactic Showdown.

What did he mean,

"play for their lives"?

I don't know.

But nine billion

channels!

( laughing )

Look at all

these great shows!

Laser soccer from Regulon.

Who Wants To Marry

A Yolkian.

Studs!

Hugh, go back!

I think I saw

the kids!

It was just some

stupid game show.

Hugh!

JUDY:

Jimmy!

My sweet baby!

What is he

doing there?!

Playing for cash

and valuable prizes,

I assume.

I'm calling

the other parents.

Stay on that channel!

Okay.

Ooh! Andromeda 90210!

Hugh!

Can't we just watch

at the commercials?

LIBBY:

Let me get

this straight.

If we don't play, he's going

to destroy the Earth?

What do we do? What do we do?!

We don't do

anything, Carl.

I have the most

extensive experience

with alien life-forms,

so I'll handle it.

My brain power

is our only hope

of winning this game.

Jimmy, as

your new friend,

may I say something?

Of course.

It was your

stupid brain power

that got us

into this mess!

( static crackles )

And we're back!

For our first event, we take

you to a desolate planetoid,

where the squishy

jelly bags from Earth

will face

the savage Gorlocks!

Let the games begin!

All right, admit it.

That was kind of cool.

All righty!

Who's ready

to play florgus ball?!

Florgus! Florgus! Florgus!

I love florgus ball!

What's florgus ball?

You've never heard

of florgus ball?

What, do you people

live in a cave?!

Look, it's simple.

All you have to do

is put this ball

through those goal posts...

We can do that!

While riding florguses!

M-M-Mr. Meldar,

do I have to play?

Can I be a cheerleader?

Oh, let me think... no!

Gorlocks and Jelly Bags,

mount your florguses!

( roars )

( grunting )

( florguses hissing,

Gorlock growling )

Heeyah! Heeyah!

Nice florgus.

Good boy.

Don't eat me.

Mommy!

Looks like this won't take long.

( grunting )

Heeyah! Heeyah!

In my homeland,

I am skilled bug rider.

Uh-oh.

Bolbi backwards!

"Chapter 27:

impress your chick

with your mastery

of the animal kingdom."

Hey, Libs!

Watch your man show

this tin-plated

flea who's boss!

Heeyah!

Whoa-oa-oa-oa!

Ready? Set? Florgus!

Leave it to me, guys!

Neutron, wait!

We can help!

( florguses hiss and s)

Oh, don't worry.

That probably didn't e.

( growling )

( game show theme playing )

MELDAR:

Score... Team Gorlock!

But she knocked me off!

She can do that?

I can do that.

( Gorlock laughing gut)

( grunting )

Good florgus...

All right, easy.

Hey, I'm on!

Everybody, look!

I'm riding a florgus!

( florgus squeals )

Neutron, this is

a team sport.

We've got

to work together.

Guys, trust me!

It's all

Euclidean geometry.

That's my specialty!

And... florgus!

( grunts )

ALL:

Florguses can fly?!

Yes! Didn't I mention?

Okay, that probably

hurt a little.

Your team plays

like the girly-men

of Xenon 5.

Surrender, and we

will be merciful.

And condemn my planet?

Never!

CARL:

Florgy, no!

Bad Florgy!

I don't care what Neut.

I'm getting in this game!

Heeyah!

Who's your girly-man now?

( roars )

I'm open!

Pass the ball!

I know I can beat him!

( Gorlock roaring )

That actually looked

quite painful.

( game show music playing )

It's Gorlocks: two, zip!

Cindy was wide open!

Why didn't you

pass it to her?!

My fault--

I didn't allow for variables.

But I've recalculated

my strategy.

This game's not over yet!

And this game is over.

The final score: Gorlocks, 586,

Earth, zippitty-doo-dah!

Your wrists are thin, ,

but your heart is valiant.

My game plan was perfect.

I don't understand

how I could have lost!

Check out

the instant replay.

You might

learn something!

( Jimmy grunting and yelling

repeatedly )

Yay!

Jimmy fall off good!

Well, it certainly

looks bad for Team Earth.

If I were an Earthling,

I'd start thinking

about how to spend my last

fear-filled hours of life!

Get out of the way!

This is unimaginable!

It's

inconceivable!

I don't believe it!

I know!

The reception is amazing!

I can see every

bead of sweat

on your terrified

son's face, Wheezer!

And if you like this,

you'll love

this new soap opera

Andromeda 90210!

( TV remote clicks )

ALL:

Turn it back!

( TV remote clicks )

Well, you bipeds

better shape up.

Teams dropping

two events in a row

have had their

planets destroyed

99.99% of the time.

Gotta say, I'm lovin'

the whole zapping thing.

It's time for

our next event--

Mountain Menace!

The humans will be

facing the Needleheads,

who are just

coming off a victory

against the Brains

in the Greased

Martian Toss!

Mibs!

( yells )

They're like

tiny nails

scratching

on the blackboard

of my brain!

MELDAR:

Whichever team retrieves

one of the mushrooms

in front of that cave wins.

But watch out for the horrible

beast that lives inside.

TEAM EARTH:

Aww.

Mib, mib.

Mib.

Oh, man, I'm going

to run over there

and get that mushroom

just to shut them up.

Check it out, babe.

Cowabunga!

( roars menacingly )

( Sheen screams )

Takes a real man

to run that fast.

Nice try, Sparky,

but how about waiting

till I start the game!

Ready? Set? Go!

( all saying "mib" )

Okay, everybody--

let's split up.

One flank to the left,

one to the right.

The right flank can run

interference for the left.

Too dangerous,

Cindy.

It'll be safer if I use

Goddard's extending claw

to grab a mushroom.

Goddard, fetch!

( Goddard squealing )

( whining pitifully )

Mibs.

Mib.

ALL:

Mib!

Mibs.

Mib.

( squeaky voice ):

Mibs.

Mibs, mibs, mib.

Mib.

Mibs, mibs, mib.

Mib.

Mib!

( Needleheads all saying "mib" )

The Needleheads win.

( cheering "mib" )

CARL:

We lost again.

We should have gone

with Cindy's plan.

How could we be

beaten by them?

Because they

played like a team.

Ever hear the word, Neutron?

Your grandstanding is going to

get the entire Earth destroyed.

Look, if you guys think

you can do a better job,

then just say so.

ALL:

We think we can do a better job!

Mibs.

( screams ):

Why you little...

Come back here!

Well, day one is over

and it looks like

Team Earth is dead last.

SPECTATORS:

Aww...

I know-- poor, overmatched,

little tiny-brains.

Let's check in with them

at base camp, shall we?

I can't lie to you-- we had

a bad first day out there.

But I still believe

I have the trust and support

of my fellow teammates.

Neutron's being

a total buttbrain.

I swear, if he gets

the Earth blown up,

our friendship is over.

Hello, peoples.

Hello to you.

I can't see you.

Are you in there?

Hello.

Yeah, I'll be honest w-

this is a man's planet.

Like I was saying

to my chicky-babe Libby earlier,

"Cupcake," I said,

"just sit back

and let your big strong hunka

man take care of you, right?"

That's it!

Stop the camera.

And you!

Come with me.

Ow, ow! Not so hard--

I'm delicate.

Uh, guys,

I think building camp

would go more quickly if we...

ALL:

Don't touch anything!

Careful, Libby.

You'll hurt your

little delicate hands.

Sheen,

what are you doing?

I shall make the fire.

But, but...

I got it.

( grunting fiercely )

Did I make the fire?

No, but you sure

beat the heck

out of the earrings

I was making.

Bad news, nitrogen gulpers.

As the last-place team,

you must now vote off

one of your teammates.

But first, a little ambiance.

Let the ritual begin.

We are not

voting anyone off.

Okay, then, in that case,

I'll have to destroy Earth.

ALL:

No!!

Quit arguing

with him, Neutron.

We all know there's

at least one person

this team would be

better off without.

Bolbi?

No-- Neutron.

Oh, so that's

the way you want it.

Well, bring it on,

Blondie.

I've got Carl

and Sheen on my side.

Right, guys?

BOTH:

Right.

Sheen, no!

Vote with me

and Cindy.

Right.

JIMMY:

Don't tell him who to vote for.

( all arguing )

Ooh, I'm loving this.

It's time to vote.

Each player will step forward

and place their vote

into the giant Head of Truth.

First up, Jimmy.

I tried to be your friend,

but I have a planet to save.

Sorry, pally.

The human race can't afford

another slip-up.

Bye-bye, big-head.

Well, you know

what they say, dude:

You can fool all the people

some of the time,

but you can't fool the time

with the people that the, the...

Forget it! Dang!

I hope that once you

get over the betrayal,

you'll still

come over for cookies.

( barks )

Bolbi not wearing underpants.

I'll tally the votes.

"Jimmy."

"Cindy."

"Bolbi."

"Cindy."

"Jimmy."

"Bowlbee."

Sorry, Libs,

but I'm not

your love puppet.

That'd be a nice

nickname, though.

MELDAR:

Two votes Jimmy.

Two votes Cindy.

Two votes Bolbi.

And the first person

voted off your team will be...

And the first person

voted off your team will be...

Bolbi.

Yes!!

Bolbi, you just voted

yourself off.

Yes-- in

everybody's face

except Bolbi.

No, you wanted to lose.

Winning is bad.

How can win

be bad?

Win be good.

Bolbi, your team has spoken.

It's time for you to go.

( screaming )

What did you

do to him?

He'll be kept in

the Cell of Indignity

until the end of the game.

You can only free him

by winning.

Remember, one more loss

and Earth will be destroyed.

Sleep tight.

Poor Bolbi-- trapped

in the Cell of Indignity.

He's probably being horribly

tormented right now.

A little to the left.

This is terrible.

We can't just sit here

and do nothing.

The funny-talking lady is right.

I'll go make some snacks.

Wait a minute, Hugh.

Doesn't Jimmy have an

old wormhole generator

outside behind

his clubhouse?

You mean that

time/space gizmo of his?

Yeah, but I was going to

turn that into a bird feeder.

Darhlink,

could this generator

get us to that planet

so we can help

our babies?

It might--

if we can get it running.

Then let's move, people!

Move it! Move it!

I will run powerful extension

cords to your lawn, yes.

I'll set up the computer

next to the clubhouse.

Sugarbooger,

what should I do?

Keep watching, Hugh.

We need to know

what's happening

with the children.

You can count on me...

just as soon as

I make some bean dip.

I can't believe

I almost got voted off.

( whines )

I know everyone wants to help,

but it's too risky.

My genius is our only chance.

What was that?

Stay here, boy.

Be quiet

or we both die.

You...!

You better back off,

I'm warning you.

I've been doing...

wrist sit-ups.

I come in peace, Earthboy--

hear me.

I can see that you are the most

intelligent of your species.

Thanks.

Uh, what do you

want exactly?

For eons, this show

has plagued the galaxy.

But with your keen mind,

we might be able to end

this game forever.

I don't see how.

Meldar can

instantaneously

transmute matter

and energy.

There's no defense

against that.

Meldar keeps us weak

by pitting us

against each other.

But if we all joined forces--

Gorlock, Human,

Needlehead and Brain--

we might find

a way to defeat him.

Wait a minute,

why should I trust you?

You almost k*lled me today.

Ah, but I didn't.

That's true.

By the way, my name

is Jimmy Neutron.

I am Chee-aaaak-toh.

But you can just

call me "April."

Chee-aaaak-toh--

nice name.

No, I'm serious.

Call me April.

I must go.

Consider my words,

Jimmy Neutron.

Neutron,

what's going on?

I thought I heard

a creepy alien.

Are you okay?

They're not creepy,

and I'm fine.

What do you care, anyway?

You tried

to vote me off tonight.

Yeah... listen, um...

about that...

I may have been

a little rough.

A little?

If it were up to you,

I'd be in the

Cell of Indignity.

Well, it was

your fault we lost.

Well, it won't

happen again.

Good night!

Good night!!

SHEEN:

Good night.

CARL:

Can I have a glass of water?

I don't love you

anymore, Malvac.

I never have.

A sulfur-breathing

vixen like you

doesn't know how to love.

Oh, no!

Could this be the end

of Dakota's torrid affair

with Dr. Malvac?

JUDY:

Hugh!

I'm changing it back.

It's time for our next event.

Let's go live

to the planet surface.

All right-- welcome back

to our second day of play.

Humans, Needleheads-- it's time

to play Can You Eat This?

Bring forth

the Wheel of Consumption.

Now, the rules are simple.

You spins it, you eats it.

Needleheads-- take it away.

Mib.

Mibs.

( chanting "Mibs" )

( chanting in unison )

NEEDLEHEADS:

Mibs!!!

( whines )

( all gulp )

Oh, too bad--

bring out the

disgusting Earth goop.

Aw, man,

banana cream pie.

How lucky

can you get?

( gulps, gasps )

Mibs, mibs...

Talk about

your messy eaters.

Humans-- you're up next.

I measured the torque

of his spin with my watch.

I think I can make the wheel

land on banana cream pie again.

This event goes to the person

with the strongest stomach.

But, uh...

No buts--

have Carl do it.

Yeah, he eats anything.

I don't eat newspaper.

Well, I'm trying to quit.

( shouting encouragement )

EARTHLINGS:

Ew!

( screams )

Mmm-mm-- it's

a scrumptious plate

of Plutonian

Gut Chunks-- yum-yum.

Great, don't listen

to the guy

who computed

the torque spin.

He lives in a sad

little fantasy world.

I can't eat that.

Carl, you've got to.

I can't.

If you don't,

the entire Earth

will be destroyed.

There'll be

no more Retroville.

No more ice cream.

No more llamas.

All right!

I'll do it for the llamas...

and Jimmy's mom.

Hmm... mmm, mmm!

Mmm, these are really good.

CARL:

Wonderful!

( slurping noisily )

Mmm-mmm... ( gulps )

Ahh.

Team Earth wins.

( cheering )

Please, sir,

can I have some more?

Come on-- let go.

Just let me lick the plate.

You're very lucky

life-forms.

I doubt you'll do as well

in the next event.

See, Neutron? That's what

happens when we work as a team.

We got lucky, Cindy.

That dish could have

poisoned Carl.

But it didn't!

We all have skills

to contribute.

Psst--

Jimmy Neutron.

Excuse me.

I got to go

fix a thing...

behind the

place... there.

What is your answer?

Will you help me?

I don't know, April.

There's a lot at stake here.

My planet could be destroyed

if I mess up again.

Would you allow a thousand

worlds to be crushed

while you tremble

like a Dembian Wimpbeetle?

Well, of course not.

You're right--

I'd rather go down fighting.

Count me in.

I knew you would

not disappoint me.

Ugh! You kissed me.

I simply pledged

loyalty to you

with the Gorlockan

Seal of Trust.

What is "kiss"?

Yeah, well, it's...

a sign of affection.

Okay, you see,

when a girl likes a boy,

then they, uh...

Aha!

I knew something funny

was going on!

No, Cindy, no.

It was a simple...

trust ritual.

Oh, like I didn't just

see you swapping alien spit!

Not that I care... at all.

I do not understand,

Jimmy Neutron.

Is the pale, homely

female your mate?

No!

No way!

Homely?!

I do not think

she is worthy of you.

Oh, yeah?

Who asked you?

No one.

Do you want a piece of me?

I thought you'd never ask.

( girls grunt )

Catfight!

Cindy, April,

stop!

Have you lost your min!

I dream about girls

fighting over me every night.

That, and swimming

in a vat of pudding.

Stop!

Conserve energy for events,

and stay away from Earth scum.

Are you all right,

Cindy?

Like you care.

Go check on your

girlfriend.

She's not my girlfriend.

We're tearing each oth!

Are you certain

this machine

will tear the

very fabric

of time and space?

Well, not with that attitude

it won't, Mr. Negative Pants.

Hugh, what's happening

on the show?

It looks bad.

Dakota just found a blonde scale

on Dr. Malvac's suit.

I mean on

Jimmy's show.

Oh, uh, I think they're going

to start the final event.

Oh, we've got

to hurry!

So, uh, how do you guys go

to the bathroom?

We have eliminated the need

for such activities.

Cool! Could you show me how?

If we could wait ten million

years for you to evolve.

Hello...

( chuckling )

( chuckles )

No, no seriously.

Brains, humans,

welcome

to the obstacle-course

challenge.

The humans need a victory

to stay alive.

Contestants must traverse

the bridge of horror,

scale the mysterious monolith,

cross the molten river,

leap over the pit of fear and

cross the finish line to win.

We'll begin

on my signal.

We can win this,

easy.

I hate to say this,

but I think you're right.

Ready?

No cheating.

And...

( fires g*n )

Guys... guys,

it's a shortcut.

That's weird.

Why would they put a sign up?

It doesn't matter.

I can see

the finish line.

Come on!

( all cheering )

We did it!

We're back in Retroville!

We won the game!

( all cheering )

Take that, alien slime!

Can you smell what the Earth

is cooking?

( all cheering )

Guys... guys,

hold it.

Something is wrong here.

Where's Bolbi?

He was supposed

to come back with us.

And where's Goddard?

CINDY:

Where's... anybody?

The whole town

is empty.

Uh, guys, check out

the street signs.

CINDY:

They're blank.

All of them.

But at least the new

daytime moon is pretty.

JIMMY:

A striped moon?

That's a meteorological

impossibility.

PARENTS ( in ghostly voice ):

Kids... Carl... Jimbo...

Did... did you

hear that?!

PARENTS:

Kids... Jimmy Neutron...

Libby...

It's coming from over there.

Come on!

PARENTS:

Kids... Kids... Kids...

Carl...

Well, this was fun.

Good luck

with everything.

Carl, get back here!

Stay close, everyone.

( door creaking )

( camera clicks )

PARENTS:

Hooray! Yay!

BOTH:

All hail the conquering

young heroes.

Mom, Dad, what a relief.

Yeah, for a moment

we thought everyone

in town had vanished.

( camera clicks )

PARENTS:

Yay! Hooray!

BOTH:

All hail the conquering

young heroes.

Okay...

Here, kids, eat and forget

this whole scary business, yes.

PARENTS:

Eat, children.

Eat and forget.

( spits )

Ew, it tastes like Sheetrock.

Wow, I've never tried

that flavor.

PARENTS ( chanting ):

Eat and forget.

Uh, Jimmy, what

the heck

is wrong

with our parents?

Could be anything--

stress, lack of sleep,

being turned into zombie aliens.

Either way, run!

( parents chanting,

children screaming )

I don't think we're

in Retroville.

This is all an illusion.

The Brains have placed us

under mass hypnosis.

What if they make us act

like chickens?!

What do we do, Jimmy?

Unless we can break

their hold on us,

we're completely at

the Brains' mercy.

PARENTS:

Eat... Forget...

They're coming!

I say we jump.

Maybe the shock

will wake us up.

Or get us k*lled.

For once trust someone

other than yourself.

I've got a gut feeling

about this.

PARENTS:

Eat... Forget...

Jimmy, come on!

This goes against science.

Trust me!

( parents chanting )

( kids screaming )

( all gasp )

We're back.

We shattered

the illusion.

But, look, the Brains

are almost at the finish line!

We're too late!

We're going to lose!

No, we're not.

We can still catch them

if we work together.

Come on!

Go without me!

( kids scream )

( screams )

( metal clinking,

sparks crackling )

Go, go!

( Libby, Sheen screaming )

Go, Carl!

( Carl screaming )

( mechanicals whirring,

sparks crackling )

Cindy, you go!

I'll hold it!

But you can't...

Just go!

Neutron!

( kids cheering )

Nice going, guys.

I knew you were going

to say that.

Oh,

did you really?

Yes, because you always do.

Oh, really?

Yes, really.

MAN ( on television ):

One of these days...

one of these days, Zoren 5--

bang, zoom!--

to the planetary nebula!

( chuckles )

I love the classics.

Better check on the kids.

Hey, Jimbo has won

another round!

All right!

This is as exciting

as it gets, folks.

Earth has pulled

into a tie

for the lead.

Jelly Bags, it looks like

you'll be facing the Gorlocks

in a sudden-death showdown.

Bring it on, tuxedo boy.

Oh, I will...

right after these messages.

( gasps )

A tie breaker

with the Gorlocks

for the very fate

of Earth itself?

I'm going to need more snacks.

Okay, that should do it.

Wormhole generator pow.

( all gasp )

Would you

look at that?

It works!

If I can lock onto

Goddard's coordinates...

And we're back.

It's time for the final event,

pitting the savage Gorlocks

against the show's biggest

surprise, Team Jelly Bag.

ALL:

Team Earth!

Whatever.

Each team must select

one player to compete

in our trivia showdown.

( growling )

You're up, Jimmy.

Maybe one of you should play.

You know as much

about their culture as I do.

Neutron, it's trivia.

If you can't answer

the question, we're doomed.

Don't think

about screwing up

and destroying

the Earth.

Have fun with it.

( gulps )

( growls )

All right, now, the first player

to bang the gong of trivia

will receive the question.

The clock starts

when I say go. Go!

Huh?!

( grunting )

( growls )

I've got to reach that gong.

( Jimmy screaming )

( roars )

Well done,

Gorlock.

Now, remember, the rules

allow you one lifeline--

someone back home

who can answer

the question.

Here's your question:

( game show theme plays )

"Why do the Krexels of Remnion 8

cross the ice caps of Merbior?"

Um... to get to the ot?

Oh, so close.

No.

It's to shed their

suction cups, and mate.

Sorry.

( Gorlock screaming )

Father!

Well,

little jelly man,

it looks like

it's all up to you.

( game show theme plays )

( beeping )

I found them!

We have their

coordinates!

Lock and load, people.

Let's do

this thing.

ALL:

One...

All right, everyone,

who wants nachos?

ALL:

Two...

Whoa!

ALL:

Three!

HUGH:

My nachos!

Hugh!

Oh, Hugh...

( screaming )

And now, Jimmy Neutron,

here is your question.

( audience gasps )

Hmm?

( Hugh screaming )

Dad?!

Jimbo, hi!

Your mom got your

wormhole thingy running,

and I saved the nachos.

Well, interesting.

It seems this jelly bag

is this earthling's lifeline.

ALL:

No, he isn't!

Hmm?

I should explain,

Dad.

Oh, I know everything, Jimbo.

You're on

Intergalactic Showdown--

the Malvexian Galaxy's